Politicians, journalists and boot-licking monarchists have been competing to celebrate the announcement that an unemployed couple – living on benefits – are to have a baby.
Usually the Tories and their mates in the millionaires’ media spend their time demonising those with an over-inflated sense of entitlement, over-sized families, who sponge off the taxpayer (but not Starbucks, who don’t pay any tax).
But apparently, the addition of an absurd number of fairy-tale titles (Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, Earl and Countess of Strathearn, Baron and Baroness Carrikfergus, Royal Knight Companion of the Most Noble Order of the Garter, Knight of the Most Ancient and Most Noble Order of the Thistle) and hobbies which include playing soldiers, fancy dress, and an endless round of taxpayer-funded luxury holidays, makes these parents’ irresponsible decision totally OK.
Will and Kate (as they’re known to the plebs on Fleet Street) are currently living rent-free in some of Britain’s biggest mansions.
The fanfare surrounding this announcement obviously has nothing to do with the fact that on Wednesday the Tories will have to announce that their cuts (including cuts to child-support and free nursery places) have totally and miserably failed to ‘Get Britain Working Again’.
In fact, more people are unemployed than ever, with official unemployment at 10% and rising.
For those worried that devastating cuts to the NHS could threaten the safe and healthy delivery of the young parasite, fear not; they are well out of reach of germs, cramped conditions, lack of beds and rising mortality rates in the under-fire NHS.
Instead, cards, flowers and contraceptives should be sent to the private King Edward VII Hospital, London. There the mother will receive the finest care available – paid for by us, the taxpayer.
In these harsh economic conditions, the news that we’ll have to fork out to feed another Royal mouth is unwelcome.
Millions of ordinary people face an uncertain future as cut after cut destroys our hospitals, schools, wages and jobs.
The happy parents-to-be will face only the hardship of a lifetime of privilege. The arduous duties of representing Britain’s aristocratic and business elite are compensated by every imaginable perk.
While struggling families are told by the Tories to rent spare rooms to strangers or lose their housing benefit, Kate and Will (or rather, their army of nannies) will raise the new Royal in houses with dozens of bedrooms and bathrooms that have never been used.
The monstrous institution called the Royal Family is a senseless waste of money that could be used to cut fees, fund EMA and build desperately-needed homes.
While a third of children in Britain live in poverty, Labour leader Ed Miliband claims this pregnancy is ‘something the whole nation can celebrate’.
Well, he can celebrate if he wants – it won’t help him win the election.
We won’t be celebrating. Instead we’ll be fighting to defend our services, education and jobs from destruction.
We say: Make Royals work for minimum wage, and see how fast things change!
We fight to:
Abolish the Monarchy – let them eat Cornflakes
Share out the Royal wealth, turn the palaces into affordable housing
Create real jobs for all – including the princes and princesses